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Purloined ( and slightly rewritten) from Garrison Keillor's joke page:
These two cannibals are walking through the jungle when they happen
upon a clown. So they tie him up, haul him back to their village, and
cook him. Later the two are sitting around the fire and after a couple
of bites, one cannibal looks at the other and says: "Does this taste
funny to you?"
If you delight in letters--remember them?-- as well as food, American history, and familial fondness, read this book. It's called Slick as a Mitten, by Dennis M. Larsen, it's published by Washington State University Press , and it's about a character named Ezra Meeker.
The book, rich with old photos, is based on Meeker's letters, mostly to his wife, Eliza Jane. She and Ezra came west on the Oregon Trail in 1852 and settled in Puyallup, Washington. Meeker, along with his father, became a wealthy hop grower and broker, but at the close of the 19th century, he went bust. The hops were infested with bugs, controlled only through exceedingly expensive methods. Ezra was also on the board of a bank, though not involved until it began to decline, all the other officers having abandoned it. He personally covered the bank's losses, all its customers, by spending most of his own money.
Unimaginable in this era of Bank of America et al? The mid to late 1890's were a time of bank closings and financial downturn in the US.
Once gold was discovered in the Klondike area in 1897, the race was on. But, unsurprisingly, so many masses of people arriving in an inhospitable area did not find enough to eat. People suggested that there was more money to be made in supplying miners than in engaging in mining itself. "There are no fresh vegetables of any kind here," said one.
Meeker took note of this and decided to supply both fresh and dried veg, as well as reconstitutable eggs to the populations springing up in Yukon tent cities. He specialized in granulated and sliced potatoes, dried cabbage, squash, sweet potatoes, turnips, pop corn, and fresh oysters from the east, hauling everything first by steamer, then along icy trails with "teamsters," and floating produce down the Yukon River.
Even lemons.
He was 67 when he started. In three years he had made possible the movement of almost 100 tons of food. And throughout those years, he wrote regularly to Wife, back home in Washington, signing himself Husband. It was Eliza Jane who supervised the dehydration of the eggs, and the preparation and packing of the veggies.
As for the phrase slick as a mitten, Ezra lost his assets that way, he said, swiftly. I picture a thick leather mitten, coated with ice.
ps Meeker planned the town of Puyallup, and named it. The name honored the native people there, known as the "generous people," but whether their generosity extended to the deeding of their lands to white settlers for hop growing I do not know. ..
Noting the 40th anniversary of the moon landing, I remember well where I was when I heard the news. I was eating dinner, chicken Kiev with green beans, in the garden of a restaurant in Iran, in Kermanshah, having just been reunited with my fiance, a Peace Corps volunteer whom I had not seen for over a year.
The waiter came out and gestured at the moon, clearly visible from our table. "Your Americans are walking around up there," he said. We looked more closely at the moon, symbol to lovers, object of poetic fancy, and felt both exhilarated and vaguely depressed.
"People are tromping around on the moon, " I said. Apollo Eleven carried a particularly unpoetic fellow up there to the land of green cheese, who read aloud a corny line as he stepped from the lunar landing module ladder onto the dusty moon surface.
Much chatter ensued later among the literati, as to the need for a writer, a poet, to visit the moon and report back with a bit more descriptive precision.
Yesterday, within hours of each other,
two individuals in charge showed their stuff. Captain Chesley B.
Sullenberger, III, drawing on years of training and experience, made
a swift decision to land his crippled US Airways plane in the Hudson
River, three minutes after takeoff from La Guardia. His astonishing
skill, and his presumed calm, confident leadership, preserved the
lives of everyone on board. And insured the safety of untold New
Yorkers as he guided the huge plane into a slim ribbon of water in
midtown Manhattan.
The other individual in charge?
Incompetent, disingenuous, and pathetic.
People recognize
what is palpable, genuine and substantive. We say goodbye and good
riddance to a fear-full era of flabby, faux leadership. We embrace
"the real stuff."
We welcome cooperation and
self-lessness--witness the efforts of New York's ferry pilots,
tugboat captains, random boaters, emergency personnel of all stripes,
working together. We salute guts and discipline--witness the way the
downed plane's crew and passengers reached safety.
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